Vices 7 - Virtues 0

So far I've diagnosed myself as a firm sufferer of 5 of the deadly sins. The remaining ones are wrath and greed. I think the former is somewhat evident, this blog serving as a living testament to yet another one of my wicked weaknesses. Greed too becomes somewhat obvious when we examine my spending habits (and inability to pay adequate attention to any food groups outside pizza...). 


Remember those yellow shoes? Suede, by the way. I did try the sensible approach. Which obviously failed as I found myself reasoning: when did I ever regret buying a pair of new shoes (hopelessly impractical and ones I can't afford) ? Never. Whereas not buying...many times. 

I find all this rather worrying. Do I not have any redeeming qualities? Do I not have any virtues? When you can't even name a single virtue, I think it's pretty safe to assume you're not a very virtuous person. Which is rather a horrifying prospect.

I actually had to google "virtue" and came across this list :

Chastity

Temperance

Charity

Patience

Diligence

Kindness

Humility

Now, chaste I am. Not by choice though. Were The Man still in my life, there's nothing I'd like more that indulging in a little bit of fornication. 

Temperance... I remember that movement... so this one is definitely not for me.

Charity I do. Just not enough. Or for the right reasons...

Patience...I did like that Guns n' Roses song about this. I even liked Take That's take on this. But as far as a life-guiding principle? I simply don't have the time.

Diligence I practice. To a point that it drives those around me mad. I demand the toilet rolls to roll out certain way, I expect the tooth paste tube to be squeezed in a certain way and I want the picture frames to be displayed at a certain angle. But that's bordering on annoying hair-splitting. Perhaps even OCD. In either case, not very virtuous.

Kindness? KINDNESS? Well sure the hell I'd display some bloody kindness to all the frigging idiots out there if only life threw some  happiness my way too, for fuck sake!

Humility... a tough one. Life has certainly put me on my knees. Not sure I'm sufficiently humbled by it all though since I'm still kicking and screaming. And clearly engaging in a bit of poorly-timed blasphemy every now and then. So no, not this one either.

Gosh. There must be a special place in Hell for the likes of me. I only hope they have Sky Sports and happy hours there...