Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Abstaining

I'm late. I don't even bother to keep track how much late. It's not like I'm pregnant anyway...

Now that I'm not having sex I don't need to freak out about that kind of things. And my nerves are not the only thing I'm saving.

I don't need to shave regularly- just think how much time I'm saving! And money- seeing how the cost of blades has skyrocketed. I'm sure even cocaine is cheaper.

And since I don't even bother leaving the house most days I don't even shower as much as I used to. So, that saves time and natural resources! As does not having to as much laundry as I did back when I still wanted to look pretty for someone and didn't live in PJs. (OK, I admit, that does sound a bit gross.)

I've also stopped buying nice lingerie to surprise that special someone with, so again I'm saving time and money. 

I only have my highlights done every 8-10 weeks which, again, saves time and money.

I'm not on the Pill which saves money. 

And what do I do with all this time and money I'm saving by not having sex? Netflix. I signed up for a month's free trial and have, for the next 26 days officially no reason to leave my flat. I just sit there, glued to the laptop screen, determined to make the most of the offer.

I'm a bit slow, but I've finally (about 4 years after the rest of the world) discovered How I Met Your Mother. Hilarious. But that, combined with Friends, Gossip Girl and the likes are, with their unrealistic portrayals of life, doing my head in.

How can people be unemployed and yet be able to afford living in sprawling loft conversions? Still be able to afford going out every night? And most importantly, how come they never seem to have hangover? 

How come these people have time to hang out with their friends all the time? And even at 16, be so wordly and knowledgeable and free to live their lives without any kind of parental or financial restrictions? And why exactly are we expected to find 30-year-old actors playing 16-year-olds credible?

I'm not too impressed with my own life. But I'm even less impressed with this.





1 comment:

  1. I don't see shows like that as descriptions of the lives of actual, real people. I always saw them as how things might be in some ideal universe, where money grew on trees etc.

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