Oh la la

My niece's visit was cancelled so I had the whole weekend to myself after all. Apparently "she's not been behaving". Well, I did tell you she had a bit of a reputation... What really cracks me up though is her parents' decision to punish her by not allowing her to come over. I think spending time with me might have been an even worse punishment...

And while on the subject of bad behaviour...

Poor Duchess of Cambridge. While she's busy putting her best LK Bennet nude stiletto-clad foot forward and being the prim and proper princess that she is; donning veils and visiting mosques in Asia, the French press are busy shoving their feet so deep into their throats they're putting Linda Lovelace out of business.

While I'm sure Manchester United's annual Tour of Asia routinely features antics that are a lot racier (as is to be expected of the overpaid, overgrown, overindulged children that are today's football stars), this one we could have done without.

Mrs. Middleton has, throughout her rise from the ranks of the middle class to the highest echelons of royalty, conducted herself with remarkable poise,maturity and grace. And then, the moment she spends a well-deserved private holiday on a private villa in  the remote countryside and finally lets her hair, guard (and bikini-top down)... she's caught in the lenses of the most ruthless paparazzis on the planet.

While not wishing to draw any parallels to her late mother-in-law's unfortunate fate (but erm... French paparazzis, anyone?) or mocking the country that takes great pride in their privacy laws (erm... French paparazzis getting away with a meagre fine that makes mockery of the whole system, anyone? ) this is all very, very undignified. And strange. How on earth could the camera's viewfinder even locate boobs that small? 

One of the most phenomenal inventions of the mankind has without a doubt been the internet. A wonderful medium that enables information be distributed instantly across the world allowing people everywhere to stay up-to-date. AND one that grants access to a whole lot of porn. Most of it free. So, surely there are enough boobs to keep everyone satisfied without invading the privacy someone who chooses to maker her living in a classier way? 

Though, I suppose the country that likes to parade around as the source of all the sophistication in the world would find itself baffled. Can the French think of anything more absurd that a happily married couple, enjoying intimacy with each other? No tacky mistresses, no sordid extra-marital indiscretions, no poorly hidden love children?

Zut, alors! Perhaps the French lover skills aren't all what they're cracked up to be? Perhaps with the English  there really is more than meets the eye?