Although only 3 posts
in, this blogging just might have saved my sanity. My heart does feel slightly
lighter as I pour my heart out here instead of staring at his pictures and
wailing out loud. (I did hide his pictures for a while, but recovered them after
realizing that talking to him out loud was even more alarming without the
pictures to address all my talking to).
As far as sanity goes
though-I must say I’m starting to understand some of those certifiably crazy
people who hear voices and see signs everywhere. So do I. Lines in films bring
back the conversations we had, pictures in magazines remind me of the places we
went to… literally everything I see or hear just reminds me of him. Even
seemingly innocent newspaper headlines somehow magically tie into my own life.
Here’s an example of
the ways my warped mind interpreted today’s Guardian:
Drone is an unmanned
aerial vehicle. My life too, is unmanned, since the man in my life decided to
turn down my proposal.
All I wanted was our
own strategic partnership document - namely a marriage certificate. But that failed
since the man (whose heart is clearly dominated by something even more sinister and misogynist than the Talebans) decided to turn down my proposal.
Aung San Suu Kyi sticks to Burma parliament boycott
Much like Suu Kyi’s
repeated protests against the tyranny of the Burmese junta have gone unanswered, so too have mine against the tyranny of the commitment phobe who was calling
all the shots in the relationship and eventually rejected any reconciliation by
turning down my proposal.
This South African
leader clearly believes in the commitment that marriage entails, unlike my man
who also used to live in South
Africa but still, after sixth year together,
turned down my proposal.
Washington keeps
distance from China's power struggle
My man liked to keep
his distance from me and my struggle to keep understanding him. Even our mutual
love of Chinese food didn’t convince him to understand his fortune, ultimately leading
him to turn down my proposal.
During this long-distance
relationship I’ve spent a lot of time travelling on planes. And while none of
them have ever crashed, my hopes of building a life and a home together did as the cricket-loving object of my affections turned down my proposal.
See? I'm nothing if not consistent...
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