"Freedom" you say...?

Today I'll take a break from gushing about love and shall engage (couldn't resist that one..) in another one of my favourite activities: French-bashing. One perceptive, intellectual and analytical individual in particular: Monsieur Gerard Depardieu.

While I totally agree that taxes are a total pain in the arse (though the magnitude of that problem is somewhat less acute for me- seeing how my income is zero and his has about 7 zeros) and I can't blame him for quitting France... I can't get my head around his decision to relocate to Russia of all the places. And I definitely can't get my head around his misguided comments about the country in the press.

So Gerry, do hear me out, s'il vous plaît.

"Russia is a great democracy" you say? HOW ABOUT YOU LOOK THE WORD "DEMOCRACY" UP IN A DICTIONARY? I'm sure that these days they are being published even in your language- seeing how more and more people are starting to realize that the rest of the world really can't be forced to speak your language (a helpful tip though: next time try it with a language that actually makes sense). Some of the key components of democracy are such frivolous things as freedom of speech, legal and viable opposition and active civil society keeping the check and balance. What do they have in Russia? They have Putin.

"Russia has great respect for artists" you say? You're right- they are reserved a special treatment alright. THEY PUT THEM IN PRISON! For exercising the very democratic values and artistic freedom of expression you hold in such great value.

"In Russia the prime minister doesn't call its own citizens bad names", you say. First let me insert some sad violin music over here to really sympathise with your plight...

Then let me get to the point: no, he probably doesn't. Because he doesn't need to - HE HAS THEM KILLED INSTEAD! And this hunting season is not limited to Russia - they do it all over the sovereign world!

Depardieu, you're a blithering oaf (been making most of the Jeeves and Wooster- boxset Santa got me as you can see. From now on I shall only insult in the manner that is appropriate for the 1920's gentry) But hey, at least you chose Russia as opposed to ruining some other , perfectly ok country...